Winter Workout Sale? Yes, Please!
It’s the middle of February. Gulp. Reality has set in. Gulp. Everything you “resolved” to do on January 1st...well, it’s still waiting patiently on your refrigerator door on that meticulously hand-written list you earnestly scribbled down when the year was new. You feel a distinct pang of guilt every time you brush past said list to reach for the chocolate syrup. Yet, glug, glug, glug goes the syrup bottle. You’re a little disappointed with yourself, right? Right. Okay. The first step is admitting there’s a problem.
And here’s a solution! Now hear me out on this, please. I know some of you will look at some of us and say, “Oh grow up! It does not matter what you wear when you workout. What matters is that YOU WORKOUT!” Okay I hear you, I really do. But for those of us already unable cough or unwilling cough cough to muster the motivation to workout, telling us to just show up in our wrinkled sleep shirt we’ve had since high school and throw on a pair of plaid pajama pants to hoist our lethargic selves onto a weight machine only to stare at our pathetic looking ensemble in those GINORMOUS MIRRORS...to you I say, you are just being flat out unreasonable. We need some incentive! Listen. Remember when you were 5 years old and your mom bought you that new pair of shoes to start kindergarten? Remember how much higher you could suddenly jump with them on? How much faster you were? How INVINCIBLE you were? Well, it’s the same thing here, only we’re adults now and I don’t care how fast I am as long as I look good while doing it. So shoot me.
Now here are the details of the sale that is going to catapult us into fitness at Joe’s New Balance Outlet: from today until February 23rd, you can save up to 58% on their winter workout gear! That includes over 40% off select women’s walking shoes and over 50% off select men’s running shoes. Don’t worry about the naysayers, y’all. THERE WILL ALWAYS BE NAYSAYERS. You just do what you need to do to get yourself in the gym and start sweatin’! Don’t forget to grab a promo code at PromoCodesForYou.com to make sure you drop the price like you’re about to drop the pounds!